I had a nap-mare yesterday that included a few scenarios to cause anxiety and fear (including a murder), but, honestly, the last scenario was the most terrifying and the one I woke up to.
It was a beautiful, sunny day and my two senior dogs and I needed to climb a set of very steep stairs that spanned the entire side of a two- or three-story concrete-block building. The building was dull yellow, but the stairs were made of bright silver metal, and they angled straight up from the bottom on one side of the building to the top on the other side, with only a single landing up there we needed to reach. Very steep, and nothing to break the trip up. Each step’s metal was weaved so you could see through them as you walked up, and there was nothing between the steps to block anything that might fall through to the bright white, hard concrete below.
I held tiny Jack (just under 10lbs) under one arm and held the leash for Mr. Pickles (just under 20lbs) as we walked slowly up the stairs. Slowly, because both dogs are seniors and stairs are a challenge now. Mr. Pickles can still do them but not as quickly as when he was young and he occasionally slips, even on the few coming into our house. In real life we have to be careful and ready to help if needed. In the dream he followed obediently one step behind me as we walked up.
Dream me was kind of stupid to even try this, but the dream reason why we absolutely needed to do it was never supplied.
When I made it about three-quarters of the way up I looked back to find Mr. Pickles had come off his leash about halfway – already a long way down to the hard concrete – and was sitting there looking up at me. I immediately felt fear and panic but before I could do anything he started running up the stairs like he did when he was younger and made it just past me before he slipped. Most of his body went through the gap between the steps, but his front legs still – barely – held him onto the step above. I was able to grab him with my free arm and wriggle him back through the gap, then I carried both dogs to the top of the stairway and onto the landing.
Before my fear and panic could turn to relief and happiness, I woke up in a sweat still feeling extreme fear and panic. Stupid dream, and I know this part of it was triggered by normal on-going concern for the health and well-being of much-loved senior dogs. But, DANG, subconscious, my conscious mind already knows to be concerned and is doing everything it can. I didn’t need a terrifying reminder, so just let me rest when I rest.
Pics for tax:
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 Tiny Jack resting on his own personal couch. |
